I celebrated my 50th birthday last summer(August, 2020) praising God for the good and the bad in my life. All the circumstances, blessings and hardships, weaved together to get me where I am now, with no regrets. Over the past 50 years, I’ve experienced amazing joy, along with struggles
that have transformed me, ultimately, into a healthier version of me. Each stage involved learning what my body, mind and soul need, embracing change, knowing my strengths, growing with my weaknesses, and accepting my limitations.
A positive mind is a must for me in combating negative or self-condemning thoughts that lead to unhealthy feelings of doubt, insecurity, inadequacy, anxiety and guilt. I try to stay grounded in what is good, what is necessary, what is true, what is helpful, and what is realistically expected of me.
Healthy expectations began when I “broke up with perfect”!
I finally realized that I was putting myself in a constant state of striving, taking on too many responsibilities and expecting too much of myself. I had unnecessary demands that I self-inflicted, and paid too much attention to societal pressures and approvals. I’ve surrendered control to God with daily prayers of how to prioritize, sacrifice, assess and regroup, allowing rest.
A healthy balance requires me focusing my energy on what I can control: my actions, my workouts, my nutrition, and my spiritual practices.
God wired me with a type “A” personality and a melancholic temperament. Both come with traits that help me and some things I need to work on. My humble, almost 51 year-old self, is grateful for the good, accepts that future battles will come, and is certain that I must focus my energy on things I can control, and leave the rest to God.
Are you realistic about your expectations of yourself and your abilities? Do you have self-condemning thoughts that get in the way of a healthy mind, body and soul? Perhaps, insecurity, inadequacy, doubt, fear, or guilt wiggle their way into your mind causing struggles with doing too much or too little?
Where do you focus your time and energy?
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